I had an elephant to eat... and I didn't know where to start but once I realized "one bite at a time", everything was ok.

Good Morning!  Rise n' shine!

I didn't read any news articles this morning so I'm in a pretty good mood!  Ha ha.  Avoiding the news and social media is a great way to stay in a positive, uplifting frame of mind.

Random Coffee Chit-Chat:  last night I was watching an old episode of Big Bang Theory (I own the dvd set).  They mentioned the fact that Michael Myers mask in Halloween was a mask of William Shatners face, turned inside out.  Of course I immediately had to look it up from various different sources to see if it was true.  Now, I'm not a fan of Star Trek.  I'm absolutely 100% not a fan of William Shatner.  And although I've seen the old 1978 movie "Halloween" a few times in my life, I'm not a huge fan of it either so this was a little trivia fact I didn't know.  (I love learning new things though - of any topic!).  


For the past week I've been procrastinating starting a huge job.  It's huge because it's like a triangle topic.  At the very top is the "TASK" but to accomplish it means about 10 sub-headings and each of those is a task in itself. 

Frankly, every time I tried to start, it was just too overwhelming to think about and I'd find myself getting too overwhelmed to even FOCUS and I'd walk away and find something else to do. 

Yesterday I got everything out, ready and tried so hard to care.  Instead I ended up deciding I really, really had to spend 2 hours organizing printed out recipes into 3 ring binders in the kitchen.  What the heck!?  What was my problem!!??  This could be a 20 minute start to finish task if I would only FOCUS.  But for over a week, I just couldn't.

But last night I decided to take the 'rough draft' and just go with it.  I tweaked it a little bit, put a small amount of thought into it, and typed up the word documents and excel spreadsheet to go with it and... called it good.  And it was!

And you know what?  It's a tiny, teeny, itty bitty piece of that giant triangle... but just getting THAT part done made me feel like I could totally move on and accomplish everything else.

I found myself thinking often during this time, of the empathy I had with kids with ADD and ADHD.  Kids that can't get their brains to focus on a task (even small ones) and things seem so very overwhelming that school work, basic household chores like cleaning their room, or doing any task becomes a giant mountain and they shut down.  I had shut down every single time I attempted to do this task for over a week!!  But in the end, it was quick, easy and not a big deal once I was in the right environment, the right frame of mind and perhaps had just the right amount of food/drink in me as well as whatever else all came together to suddenly be 'ok'.   (I hadn't ate since lunch, it was now about 6:pm and I had had a B-12 drink that afternoon around 4:00 with caffeine in it too.)  All the pieces came together last night to make the task 'easy' that had been OMG overwhelming for over a week.
Now that I have that tiny piece done, there are 3 more parts to it.  But oddly enough I'm ok with that, even though it's going to be about 6-7 hours of work for the next stage of it.  Meh, totally do-able.  That 20 minute 'start' was so overwhelming to me, but suddenly it was done and all is fine.  I feel like- 
I had an elephant to eat... and I didn't know where to start but once I realized "one bite at a time", everything was ok.

I'm not sure where I'm going with this except that I keep thinking of family members and extended family members with ADD and ADHD and how I've watched them struggle... and I felt some empathy with the crazy way my brain simply and absolutely would not and could not focus for even more than 10 seconds on this.  I wanted to!  I tried!  At two points I was almost in tears because I wanted to just DO IT so badly but I could NOT get my brain to simply STOP.  It was firing off in all directions and it was like herding a hundred thousand cats.  The focus was absolutely impossible and I was really, quite incapable of forcing it.  Until I wasn't.

Don't mind me.... it's just the coffee talking again.

Here is the Big Bang Theory dvd set I mentioned in my post above.  I bought mine from Amazon as well.

  The Big Bang Theory: The Complete Series (Limited Edition Blu-ray + Digital)