A man's version of "I didn't do anything today" and a woman's version of "didn't do anything today" is VASTLY different.

When Mr. Coffee got off work I happened to be in the basement (where the garage door is that he enters through) and he walked in to find me standing there with an arm full of 'excess' paper goods I had gone down to grab from storage, as we were 'out' of paper towels and paper plates upstairs.  

Right before he arrived home, before I grabbed the paper towels and paper plates out of the storage bin, I had thought about the guests that are coming in June and how I didn't know if we still had our queen double air mattress for a 'backup' just in case we get more people that we anticipate.  So I had gone into the garage to look through the shelves and the camping supplies (didn't find it, and I'm pretty sure our youngest daughter borrowed it about 1 1/2 years ago and it's never been seen again).

But while in the garage looking for the air mattress, prior to getting the paper goods from storage, I also realized I needed to put down new glue strips by the edge of the garage doors where little spiders and other critters might squeeze through - which I do not take kindly to!  I MUST have glue strips down everywhere "just in case" because... it's a thing.  Just go with it.

So I put new glue strip boxes out, moved the baby infant car seat base that DH never put away like he said he was going to, then climbed up on a chair to look through a bin on a high shelf to see what was in it.  Looked around for a pen, found one, scribbled on the outside of the bin what was in it, climbed back down, went through the entry door, picked up my paper goods and saw DH had left the rustic framed puzzle out, which I had bought matte polyurethane finish for 2 days ago so I wanted to see if he had put any on it... and THEN I heard the garage door go up and he came into the house.

We walked upstairs, I put the paper goods away and he asked me about my day.  

"So, how was your day?  What'd you do?"

"Oh, nothing really.  I was lazy and didn't much of anything!  I didn't go anywhere or see anyone, it was awesome."

But as we walked into the living room I continued....

"Well, I did dishes of course, got the dishwasher emptied and ran a new load of dirty.  Cleaned the counters.  Watered the plants. Did the laundry.  Oh, and I had to empty out those huge 5 gallon buckets I had on the deck with rain water in them because I saw mosquito larvae in them."

At that point I launched into a story about how I had been planting tomatoes and jalapenos and planting seed plugs yesterday and had wanted to water the new plants and had noticed the mosquito larvae when I was filling up the jug with water.  This led me to get some bleach tablets to drop into the buckets to kill off the larvae, and how I saw a huge black ant almost an inch long so I had gone into the house to get ant spray and sprayed around the deck area - and a bit into to the rain water to make sure those little critters were dead before I poured all the water out because I didn't want them to find a little rain puddle and survive.

Then went on to tell him about how this morning I had to lug those heavy water filled 5 lb. buckets (which is about 40 lbs.), and I described how I (with no upper body strength) tried to lug it across the slippery deck (it had rained all morning) while barefoot and in my pajama pants, and how going down the stairs the water shifted and threw me off balance, and I grabbed the ballaster-thingy to catch myself from falling down the stair, but it broke off the deck railing and it fell, while I slipped and gouged my big toe.  Then I still had to pick up the bucket, lug it across the wet grass to the woods area, dodging piles of doggy doo and dump it at the edge of the woods.

And then I had to dump the 2nd bucket.  Another story ensued.

At that point I think I reiterated something about "But really... I didn't do much of anything today.  It was so nice!  But I did have to....."

Then I told him about how our (really sick with cancer and not much time left) dog couldn't get up this morning and how I let the other dog out, got human food (chicken) for the sick dog because it's one of the only things I can convince her to eat right now, and even that is only 'sometimes', let the other dog in, was wiping her paws and I heard the first dog drinking water so I knew she had gotten up.  I went on to tell him about how she wouldn't touch any food, but was drinking a bunch of water, and how I knew she would throw it up, so I was getting her back to her bed area (where I have a shower curtain floor on the floor under her bed for potty incontinence and throw up) and how when I was doing this, the other dog ate all the sick dogs food...  blah blah blah.

I mentioned how I also did research for about 1 1/2 hours on a new food sealer as mine is old and the heating element is going out but the company doesn't make the model number I have anymore - although they have one they SAY is for 'my' model NAME but it's a different number.  And how I decided to just buy a new one, and researching the top budget sealers and which one I decided on and how much it would be.

I planned dinner, marinated the chicken, and a couple other things....

And I realized that for me... this was pretty much doing "NOTHING" all day. But I really shouldn't say that anymore when he asks.  Because when he hears me say "Oh, nothing really...."  he kind of stops listening and thinks I really did... nothing.

Because when I ask him how HIS day was and "what did you do today?"  and he answers, "nothing"... he really DID DO NOTHING.  As in - sat on the couch and dinked around online, watched tv and maybe noodled on his guitar.  But really, did nothing.

A man's version of "I didn't do anything today" and a woman's version of "didn't do anything today" is VASTLY different.

Which reminded me of the old "I'm going to bed" prose that was so popular in the early 2000's.  Remember that one?

What Mom does when she announces she 's going to bed verses what Dad does when he goes to bed?

SO TRUE.  Ha ha.



I'm Going to Bed

Mom and Dad were watching TV when Mom said, I'm tired, and it's getting
late. I think I'll go to bed."

She went to the kitchen to make sandwiches for the next day's lunches,
rinsed out the popcorn bowls, took meat out of the freezer for supper the
following evening, checked the cereal box levels, filled the sugar
container, put spoons and bowls on the table and started the coffee pot for
brewing the next morning.

She then put some wet clothes into the dryer, put a load of clothes into the
wash, ironed a shirt and secured a loose button. She picked up the
newspapers strewn on the floor, picked up the game pieces left on the table
and put the telephone book back into the drawer. She watered the plants,
emptied a wastebasket and hung up a towel to dry. She yawned and stretched
and headed for the bedroom.

She stopped by the desk and wrote a note to the
teacher, counted out some cash for the field trip, and pulled a textbook out
from hiding under the chair. She signed a birthday card for a friend,
addressed and stamped the envelope and wrote a quick note for the grocery
store. She put both near her purse. Mom then creamed her face, put on
moisturizer, brushed and flossed her teeth and trimmed her nails.

Hubby called, "I thought you were going to bed."
"I'm on my way," she said.

She put some water into the dog's dish and put the cat outside, then made
sure the doors were locked. She looked in on each of the kids and turned out
a bedside lamp, hung up a shirt, threw some dirty socks in the hamper, and
had a brief conversation with the one up still doing homework. In her own
room, she set the alarm, laid out clothing for the next day, straightened up
the shoe rack. She added three things to her list of things to do for

About that time, the husband turned off the TV and announced to no
one in particular "I'm going to bed," and he did.





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Thanks for sharing morning coffee with me!