Morning Coffee....


Coffee's hot and ready!  Thanks for stopping by... have a seat!
Starting off this morning with a sweet meme.  Awww.  The elderly man sitting in the car spoon-feeding his wife her ice cream.  Such love and devotion.

From what I'm told by my elderly relatives, and what I am also seeing myself as I get older is that when you look at your spouse, even though you might be 85 years old... you still see them as that 19 year old they used to be when you met.  Or that 23 year old they were when you married.  Or... you get the idea.  When you are with someone that long you see them as they are of course, but in your mind you don't necessarily see them as others do.

I know I do that with my husband already as well.  He'll forever be that 17 year old guy I fell head over heels in love with, at the same time he's also 19, 30 and 35 or 40 all at the same time.  He may be older now, with some gray hairs and some wrinkles and he's had to start using reading glasses... but I don't 'see' those things when I look at him on a regular day to day basis.  I just see... 'him'.  Sometimes I don't even realize he has glasses on.  I've seen him almost every day of my life since we were 15/16 years old and it's almost like... seeing your own hand.

You know what your hand looks like, so it's not like you take a 'new' look at it as if seeing it for the first time.  You might not notice the wrinkles, some darker spots where you've spent too many years in the sun, a new crease or even little paper cut here or there.  You only notice when you stop and make a point to look at them closely.
My Dad used to make comments about how when he looks at my Mom, he still sees the 17 year old girl he married.  I thought it was just him being nice.  But I know now, when you've been with someone for decades, you really do still see the person you love as not really an 'age' at all.  Certainly not as 'old' as others do when they look at you and your spouse.

So it's possible that the elderly man spoon feeding his wife ice cream isn't seeing the same incapacitated white haired 'old' lady that we do.  He's just helping out his wife... and when he looks at her he probably sees a mixture of his wife at 23, 36, 42, 60 and 70... all at the same time.  
He's just doing what they do.  Living their life.  Doing 'the next thing' that comes up that you deal with as age creeps up on you.  
Very sweet.  Such devotion.  Care. 
But like my Great Uncle who has a similar situation with his wife (who doesn't even know who he is anymore) he would look at you as if you were crazy if you mention it to him and he'd probably reply "Well... what the hell else am I gonna do?  We came for ice cream and she can't feed herself!" and then he'd turn around and keep giving her some ice cream.

I'm gonna quit my job and travel the world until I run out of money!
I estimate I'll be home again around 10:00 PM this evening....

THIS has happened to me too many dang times to count.
It was funny to see a comic about it.

When ice attacks your face.....

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Thanks for sharing morning coffee with me!