1.20.2022

It's Just the Coffee Talking: My husband is listed first as 'primary' on almost everything even when it's mine.... LOL

Good Morning Coffee Friends -

Such a busy morning that it's already past 10:30 am and I forgot all about coffee talking until now.  I'm actually on "hold" for two important tasks that need to be done because I need Mr. Coffee's authorization to discuss the accounts (sigh).  I get it.  I do.  But it also gets old fast. 

Actually that kind of leads into the same topic but a different stream...  Things that are in my husbands name or he is listed primary when he in fact has little or nothing to do with the account or even has knowledge of anything about it.  Like my car. 

When we bought my car we wanted both our names on ownership.  (We do this with all our big items or accounts so it makes it easier legally to deal with should something happen to one of us.)  When we bought my car we had both our names on the paperwork - and I listed mine first as primary; this was 'my' car and Mr. Coffee would pretty much have zero to do with it, never drive it, not pay for it, not maintenance it, etc.  

They brought the paperwork out to us to sign and there it was... his name first.  Primary account owner.  Me, second.  I asked why?  The financial person seemed a little off-put that I asked... and confused.  They kind of stuttered and said, "Well, we just usually put the husbands name first... we just tend to... uh, we can uh, change it if you want though.  I'll have to go back and reprint all the paperwork...."

Of course you know the HELL buying a car is - even when it goes smoothly it still takes hours from start to finish and by the time you have a half inch of paperwork in front of you to sign you just want to GO HOME.  So of course I took a deep breath, sighed and said, "No, that's fine.  I want to sign and get out of here...."

So Mr. Coffee's name is listed as the 'owner' of my car.

It irked me every dang time I logged in online to pay the car payment and saw his name listed even though he has never, ever once logged in to the account and wouldn't be able to tell you anything about the account or the loan even if a gun was at his head to do so.

Luckily the car was paid off last month so I don't have to see his name on the account every stinking month. 

WHICH REMINDS ME of this scene from Prize Winner of Defiance Ohio...  (one of my favorite top 10 movies...).  This scene is where the WIFE uses HER money to put money down on a house.  When she is prepares to sign the paperwork the banker did the same thing to her as the car dealership did to me in having my husband sign for it.   (I'll post the clip below so you can watch it....)

 

 

 

 

 

Another example... I have a Costco and a Sam's Club membership.  Me.  I have it.  It's in my name.
But because you get one free card for a household or family member, I have my husband listed as a second card holder.  For the record, he went to Costco ONCE in the past 10 years because I drug him there with me one day.  He's been to Sam's Club TWICE in 10 years; again, with me and we were buying the alcohol and things for a wedding reception.  

That's it.

So yesterday, out of the blue, Sam's Club sends him a brand new pretty black and silver Plus Membership Card.  

Him.  Not me.

I never got a pretty new card.  Mine is the old one - years old - white and blue.
His came in HIS name.  Not even both our cards in the same envelope.  

Nothing for me even though I'm the main name on the account.  LOL.

A card he won't even carry as he never ever ever shops there.

So this doesn't bug me so much that I'm ranting or raving about it... I'm just shaking my head and talking about it over morning coffee with you.  Casual coffee conversation. 

It came to mind though, as I'm waiting for my husband to get home so I can call a company about an account we have - but the account is in HIS name - so even though I sent up the online account, I pay the payment every month and I do the filing - I CAN'T speak to them about the account without his permission so they have to have him on the phone first, then he can hand it to me.

And that is how this morning's post came to be.

Meh, it's just the coffee talking again anyway.