It's Just the Coffee Talking: When your driver's license photo is so terrible that you look like a freaking psychopathic serial killer in it

Good Morning Coffee Friends!

A special good morning to a coffee friend with the flu this weekend; and another coffee friend who is home with her cats while her husband starts a new job in another state.  

This morning I'm drinking Peppermint bark coffee - which I've mentioned many times previously but I haven't been drinking for about a month or so.  I've been drinking primarily black coffee or chai tea.

But I'm back to peppermint because it's coooold outside!  And as much as I do not like 'flavored' coffee; this particular Peppermint Bark flavored coffee by Donut Shop is the one and only version I absolutely love... but usually only when it's freezing cold outside.  Which it is.  But ALSO because I came across one (1) random box on the shelf at Walmart Grocery yesterday and it was marked... HALF PRICE.  Woohoo!  For $7 I couldn't resist.  So I'm braving the cold weather with my second cup of hot, peppermint vanilla coffee.

I know I mentioned yesterday how excited and happy I was to have been able to run my errand regarding my car's title paperwork and have it go so fast and smooth; but that NEVER EVER HAPPENS and it's on my mind so I'm going to chit-chat about it for a minute because it led to something else I'm super excited about yesterday.

While I was at the window doing the car title paperwork, I mentioned how surprised I was they weren't more busy.  The clerk agreed and said she was shocked.  It was a Friday, and was getting near the end of the month when car registrations were due - not to mention everything else their office handles.  She said it was strange but with more people opting to do registration renewals and anything else they can online, that was probably part of it.

I took the opportunity of the lack of crowds and lines to ask about the chance of me getting a replacement driver's license done that day?   She said sure - no problem!  (There was only one other person doing their driver's license at the time; an elderly lady who looked to be in her 80's and she was almost finished).

Here's the deal with my license....

NO ONE has seen it but me and the few clerks I've had to show it to in the past almost 2 years I've had it.

NO one.  Not even my husband.

It's that bad.

And it's been a sore topic to me from the start.

For those of you who remember me chatting over coffee about it two years ago....  you will recall the horrible trip - the start of Covid lock-downs - the hours I waited - how my social security card was lost - how I had to make a second trip (45 minutes away) the next day, in the rain, to search the parking lot to try to find it - how the officer inside is the one who had it because she had forgotten to give it to me with all my paperwork when I left - yada yada.

But also... my photo was the worst photo in the history of driver's license photos.

To stand there with a stupid fake smile on my face in front of people; the officer babbling about some story she was telling me - and not taking the picture. 

I held the pose forever and no photo.  She stopped babbling to ask me something and I, still holding my pose for about a full minute already - but now uncomfortable, rocked up on my toes a little bit, which stuck my neck out like a freaking turkey, and I was trying to keep my eyes open so they wouldn't blink in the picture; and I was holding my smile trying to answer her question.

And then she took the picture.

You guys... my driver's license photo (when I saw it) made me want to throw up and cry and gasp all at the same time.

I look like a fucking psychopath.  Bulging eyes, freaked out weird fake smile, neck stretched up and out towards the camera oddly.

I immediately HID that stupid driver's license in my billfold, inside a folded coffee coupon.

That is where it's lived for almost two (2) years.  The ONLY people who have seen it are the random clerks at the grocery store that needed id - and the guy who does our taxes who had to copy it for our files.

Not even my husband has seen it.  It's THAT bad.

You know when someone does something really awful like they are a serial killer or they go insane and make the headline news - and the news journalists use the only 'public' photo of something they have quickly?  The persons driver's license photo.  And you see the picture on the computer or tv screen and they look insane and you say, "Yep, you can tell that person is fucked up.  That's a psycho alright, look at that face!" 

That was my photo.

And yesterday, because all the planets and stars aligned, I got to do a replacement driver's license (yes I had to pay full price again for it but I don't care - seriously - don't care).  

Is the photo (I have a black and white paper version until my real one comes) good?  No, not great.  It's fine... it's a regular driver's license photo.  Not one I'm going to be showing people on purpose because I love it, but it's fine.  I don't have to be mortified and hide it between an old folded up coffee coupon in my billfold so no one can accidentally see it.

ANY photo (no really... ANY photo) is better than my psycho serial killer driver's license photo I've had to live with for almost two years. 

I was so happy I could have cried happy tears.

And THAT is another reason why I was so, so thrilled yesterdays errands went smoothly and there were miraculously no crowds there.